James Went To Sevilla

Back in September, I decided that I’d like another holiday before the end of the year – I wanted to sit and drink beer in the sunshine one final time before winter arrived.  So I stopped drinking for a few weeks (minus one or two very minor aberrations). I didn’t know where to go, or who to go with.  I did suggest to a couple of friends about the idea of going away, but none seemed even remotely keen but I’d also been thinking about going away by myself.  I was going to do the Swiss Alps trip by myself … Continued

Nearly Holiday Time

Spanish Fantasy I (Juliet Fremont)

1 more working day and I have a whole week off work. In fact, it isn’t even a proper day of work tomorrow as the afternoon is an OKR session followed by some form of beer. I do need a week off.  I’ve required a holiday for ages.  This will actually be the first full week off work since I started my job in April.  And the whole time that I was unemployed I was doing 5 or 6 day weeks of 9-5 studying/coding. So effectively my first full week off since Ibiza 2016.  Which wasn’t exactly restful. I’m not … Continued

My First Spanish Letter: Consell De Ivissa

stunning cala tarida beach view in ibiza

Last time I went to Ibiza, I saw that the Consell De Ivissa had a ‘Refugees Welcome’ banner outside.  I thought that I should write to them.  9 months later, I did. ****** Hola Ibiza Mi nombre es James y yo amo tu isla.  Lo siento por mi Español malo.  Estoy apriendo.  Yo intento. Lo siento acerca Brexit.  Y lo siento acerca estupido politicos hablamos acerca guerra entre Inglaterra y Español. Yo penso Brexit sera muy malo.  Muy mierde. Es posible necessito escapar.  Cuando yo visite Eivissa año pasado, yo vez un poster de “Refugees Welcome”.  Esto incluye Ingles Brexit … Continued

Complaint: Yoghurt Pots

Hi Sainsbury’s Long time no speak.  Well I did e-mail you some time ago but I never received a response.  I had to e-mail directly as the form wasn’t working. Though that was also a long time ago.  Depending on your definition of long.  And depending on your definition of time. A long time ago, you changed your yoghurt pots.  I’m talking the excellent value 6x small yoghurt packs that retail for £1.10. Gone was the strong and stable pot, in came the weak and wobbly pot. It really is quite a flimsy design. 5 times now I have had … Continued

James Went To Some Exhibitions

It always tickles me when you speak to an immigrant and they reel off all the places they have visited; Buckingham Palace, London Eye, Tower Of London, Natural History Museum, Science Museum, Imperial War Museum, Transport Museum…   You name it, they’ve done it.  You name it, I haven’t.   It isn’t because I don’t want to go.  My to-do list is chocka with cultural activities, parks, museums, restaurants (and pubs) that I want to go to.  Unsurprisingly, I make it to the pubs – probably because it is easier to find someone to come with me, “do you want … Continued

BBC Election Complaint 2

BBC Offices and MediaCity Footbridge

Arguably a tad tenuous but hey. ****** Dear Sir/Madam I note again that you have spent huge amounts of money covering what is now clearly a left-wing, socialist-promoting event, in Glastonbury. This is completely against the BBC’s charter to specifically be spending so much money and time on one long political event, designed to brainwash the young and middle classes into supporting what would be destructive socialism. It is not only the coverage of his speech, but also the reporting of it, and the tweeting of his “ace” speech – looking at you Radio One.  Deleted, of course but not … Continued

BBC Election Complaint 1

Photo showing the opening of SEARCH exhibition by Duke of Edinburgh, with Margaret Thatcher

The BBC often annoy me with the left-leaning political coverage, but they took it to new levels during the election campaign. Looking back, I think I had an excellent point with this complaint.  Not so sure on the next one I’ll post… ****** Dear Sir/Madam I have just come back from my imaginary girlfriend’s house, Margaret, where I was watching the debate.  I didn’t really want to watch the debate, but she was watching it so I had no choice. Immediately it was clear that a pro-Corbyn audience had been picked.  The BBC had clearly picked a majority who would … Continued

No Booze Until No Belly

That’s it.  I’ve had enough. Until the last week or so, it seemed like every day I have either got drunk or been hungover. Since March, I have put on nearly 12kg of weight.  I am the fattest that I have ever been.  I feel unhealthy, I am unfit, my productivity is lower than it should be – though I have had fuckloads of fun in recent months. There is only one reason I put on weight, and that is alcohol.  If I have more than two beers, I crave shit food.  And then the next day, I crave shit … Continued

Complaint: Badvocado

Written when I was unemployed… ****** “Oh not him again”. Yes I know, you thought that you wouldn’t hear from me again now I’m unemployed (technically on gardening leave which means I do things like sorting out kitchen cupboards looking for out of date tins of pineapple), as I am now just a yellow sticker boy with an occasional foray into Iceland.  I shall still probably buy carrots from you. But on my last weekly shop with you until I am redeemed from this life of loneliness (I have lots of friends, honest), I have disappointment to proffer. Recently I … Continued

Londonniversary

Congratulations to me!   One year ago today, I loaded my boxes onto a van and said goodbye to Bracknell – and hello to London.   Yes, it is one year since I moved into my house in Harrow and started preparing for my new life as a web developer.  My new life living in London.   I remember that first week well – it was hot, which made moving and unpacking quite a sweaty affair.  I had an awesome pork belly lunch on the Friday at The Chapel in Marylebone, with Martin, and then walked around Regent’s Park – … Continued