No No To BoJo

Ukraine and Great Britain will

I used to be a huge fan of Boris Johnson. Hell, even as recently as 2015, I said (and I cannot quite believe I wrote this), “But I do really want Boris as leader,  He would be an inspirational leader.  He would really take our country forward and I feel that he would be able to deliver a two-term Conservative majority.  He has that common touch.”. After all, he supported immigration, he defended bankers, he attacked murderous bastards like Assad, he supported Britain being in the EU, and especially the Single Market.  Didn’t he? He seemed a liberal Conservative, which … Continued

James Went To Croatia – Last Year

All this extra time I have thanks to my new job and getting home at the more human hour of around 6pm (or so) has led me to think that maybe I should try to catch up with things on my to-do list.Some things have been on there for nearly a year, such as writing a blog post about my holiday to Croatia last year. I’m not sure that I would have been able to remember much in the way of details had I written the blog when I got back home, let alone nearly a year later.  It was … Continued

James Went To Belgrade

Why did I decide to go to Belgrade? Because it was cheap. Why was the flight so cheap? Because it was at 5:55am in the morning. Who’s fucking idea was that? It wasn’t actually that bad though, just needed to set my alarm for 1:30am (thankfully I had a stonking hangover the day before so going to bed early was easy), get a taxi to Wembley Park station, then get the night tube to West Hampstead, then get the Thameslink train to Luton Airport parkway, then get the bus to Luton Airport. Simples. Originally it was just me and my … Continued

Old Job Thoughts. New Job Thoughts.

person in black leather boots sitting on brown cardboard boxes

I know that I occasionally moaned about Lovespace – normally when they were stopping me from doing what I wanted to do, ie coding, and sending me to go flyering – or asking me to go on the customer chat thing when I got home from work. Despite minor annoyances, I actually really enjoyed working there. Never before have I had a job where I actually enjoyed being at work almost every day. My first proper developer role, I learnt so much there – going from complete imposter to someone very comfortable, yet still continually challenged. It was quite sad … Continued

A Mullet Massacre

I used to have a really good barber, really sound guy. Then he left. I thought I’d keep going to the same barber shop, last time I went (still £35), had an unconvincing hair cut and a very quiet one too (if I’m going to be there 45 minutes then at least say more than hello). Booked with someone else this time, again at the same barber shop. After 15 minutes I realised that he was doing very little other than combing my hair. He realised that I had realised then stated that he was thinking about what to do. … Continued

From Boxes To Bras – I Have News

From boxes to bras. From storage to suits. From packaging to pies. Yes, you have guessed correctly – you are looking at the new software engineer at Marks & Spencer. Well, you are reading words and daydreaming about me eating an M&S steak and ale pie in a suit. I hope. Back in February, I concluded that I was pretty much ready for the next challenge in my career. There was nothing pushing me out of Lovespace – I’ve never had a job where I genuinely look forward to going to work 95% of the time, where I actually enjoy … Continued

Metropolitan Line Complaint Part 1

It’s actually been alright recently – well, perhaps more accurately I’ve been lucky and missed the worst delays. Working from home two days a week helps too. As does the relatively dry weather recently – there are definite service suspension seasons and the next will be the first really hot day, when it gets to around 30’C. This complaint is from last year and not the funniest ever – just a rant. Part 2 is more fun. ****** Dear Sir/MadamI’d like to make yet another complaint about the Metropolitan line service.Tuesday was yet another clusterfuck of a service.  A signal … Continued

James Went To Exeter

Two of my dearest advisors had concocted a birthday surprise for me at the end of February – a mystery tour of a mystery place. All that I knew was that I needed my passport. Exciting! We drove past enticing places such as Basingstoke, Bracknell and Salisbury, then past Stonehenge until it became clear that I was either being taken to Exeter or Newquay. What is in Exeter I wonder? What government enterprise might be of interest to me that is located there? After a spot of lunch and a chance to listen to 6 women loudly cackling next to … Continued

Detox 2019: 90 Days & 90 K

detox text on round blue plate

If you saw me over the last few months of 2018, or just read the banal self-loathing crap that I occasionally spout, you’ll realise that I stepped up a gear from fat to obese last year.  At the end of 2018 I was 16kg heavier than at the end of my 2018 detox. Therefore this year’s detox comes in two parts. The first part is simply 90 days without alcohol. Though since I started, I have decided to extend this until Easter. With an emphasis on repairing my diet during this time, which has become solely focused on my brain’s … Continued

Complaint: Sainsbury’s Avocados. Again.

Two ripe avocado halves with the pit removed, placed on a light gray surface.

[From 2018] Hi Sainsburys How is my favourite supermarket doing?  I hear that you had pretty good Christmas results.Alas, your avocados have been a little disappointing on occasion recently. Twice I have bought your dual pack of ripe avocados in recent weeks (I’m stretching the definition of recent here) and ended up being disappointed.  So disappointed that I have taken to buying avocados from Tesco. As you may understand, now that I have moved to London, I need to prove my credentials by eating as many avocados as possible – especially on toast.  And not just any toast, but the … Continued